Little Girl

Remember when you where small, looking up to those 16 year old girls they were always weird you never thought of being one of them. Those high school girls walking around in high heels and being totally proud of themselves. An now you aren't 6 anymore you are now that 16 year old girl you always thought was weird. You are now either one of those girls or the one that hates them all.   Well I am the one walking around in high heels and being proud of it. Back then those girls were smoking and I was so sure I would never do that, Here I am: a smoking, arrogant and bitchy teenager.

The pain of dreams

Have you ever had that feeling after a dream:  It feels so real and you can't keep reality from dream for a moment. Then you realize that it was a dream and you know it will never be real. Sometimes it is good when it isn't real because you don't want bad dreams to be real but you still feel the fear when you wake up. Then there are happy dreams for what you nothing wish harder than it to be real. Imagine you are with a guy in your dream and that what is between you feels so real that you still feel it when you wake up and than it hits you that it isn't real.

Bitch

I always thought being a bitch would be amazing. Being fame and accepted and all that. You feel amazing when someone tells you that you look good, but they only mean your body not your face.At first you feel happy and kind of proud, that feeling changes when you realize everything is like before just that you know who is looking at your neck line .The only thing you want than is that he looks in to your eyes and tells you are beautiful and not sexy but that will never happen.

Real Love

"Real love doesn't exist " there are some girls who would hate you for that sentence because they dream of real love, of meeting a guy just made for them.I don't believe in real love because there is no way a guy could love you your whole life.There will always be a girl better, prettier and lovelier than you.It could be that one day a guy shows me that real love does exist but until now I haven't met him and still believe like maleficient "real love doesn't exist "

Guys

Have you ever dreamed of a guy standing in front of you while you look tired and sloppy,your hair goes off into every direction, you are still in sweatpants and wear a far too big shirt.When you see other girls with undone hairstyles they look beautiful and you know that you will never see yourself like that.Everytime I see myself in the mirror, when I'm made up to go out  I know I will always look the same way, but I don't, if I see pictures from past moments my style changed and the way I do my make up.I'm not the type who changes haircut or color too drastically.

Fangirls

I never thougt of myself as a Fangirl screaming after some random stars, I could never understand people like that. I always was apart from those girls , didn´t want to be near them screaming but I got the same anyway. As a total fan of 5 Seconds of Summer , Connor Franta and Divergent I stand here.There are just 3 Fandoms but having less is worse because you have more to focus on from each one and for the people around you, you just seem totally insane. If my friend wasn´t such a big fan of 5 Seconds of Summer too she would have never bought me a poster. In London I was standing infront of those things where they have the posters and I stood infront of that and was almost crying because I had no money and than she bought me one of the posters.

Turning 16

When you turn 16 everything changes I thougt, I wished, but it never happend. My biggest wish is going to New York, I picture it like the best place to be but I fear it will not be that way at all. I have always wanted to go to london but it was not at all like I wanted it to be. I thought it would be amazing an beautiful and like all those black and white pictures you see all around on Postcards. It was not like that at all, everywhere were tourist and you could go nowhere without being surrounded by them, I hate it when there are so many people around and so I was pretty disappointed when I got back home